A Storm of Confusion

Once upon a time, a storm began brewing. It wasn't just any ordinary storm that pops up amidst a hot summer day and passes as quickly as it appeared. No; this storm was different. The clouds darkened as they began to weigh heavier and heavier. They stretched and grew and boomed loudly into the distance. Then in a moment, a flash flood broke out in every major city across the nation. The flood consisted of people from every race and ethnicity. They stormed the streets with emotions from a rain of sadness to a thunder of anger. There was no end in sight to this particular storm. Attempting to track it seemed impossible! Some parts of the storm seemed peaceful; but then out of nowhere a tornado watch would occur. Occasionally it would start to hail and the winds would pick up. It shook the ground as it tore down buildings and destroyed families. How could a storm be so powerful?

A man by the name of George Floyd died May 25th in Minneapolis, Minnesota. This my friends is where the storm began. I have struggled to collect my thoughts regarding this national disaster. We seemed to have moved from one crisis to another... the first being a worldwide pandemic and now this, a man who lost his life to a seemingly careless law enforcer. The scene went viral. The storm grew overnight. Was the end of the world occurring or was this instance a sampling of labor pains before the birth of a natural disaster? The future is unknown. However, they say when you feel endangered like the end is nearing, your life will flash before your eyes... and if you are able to walk away unharmed you might just think on things a little differently than before. I know my life has not been endangered personally, and for that I'm thankful. However, this storm has caused me to slow down and think on more things that matter to me instead of going about my day to day life on auto pilot only placing my focus on my children. I want people to know their value. I want others to feel loved. Staying in my own little bubble isn't what Christ has called me to. Most of my life, I've dealt with others twisting my words and painting pictures of me that were untrue and hurtful. It drove me into seasons of anxiety and hushed me up from giving my opinions so freely. Although, it also encouraged me to listen more, and think more about how I speak and come across to others. I still won't give my opinions unless asked because I want others to feel heard first and foremost; unless I'm here on my blog, where I feel this is my space to say whatever is on my heart. Trust me though, when I say that what I post here is thought on for some time and prayed over before I release it into the world of unknown readers. I only pray my ability to be vulnerable is respected. As far as this current storm our world is amidst, I want to say that I'm listening. Each and everyone of you has been heard. Now I ask of you, are you listening?

Here are my words:
I respect people of all color and all ethnicities. I am a christian meaning I follow Christ. He calls us to-

"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." 

1 Peter 5:7

I don't care who you are, what you've done, or where you've come from. I am called to love you, and I do. The Lord never said in order to love, we as Christians have to see eye to eye with each other to love each other. So please do not doubt your love from me! Also, do not doubt your love from our Heavenly Father. I have not seen much love shared between people lately, and it hurts my heart deeply. So much of the world is pointing fingers at one another, saying they are hurt and angry. They are taring each other down instead of building each other up. I ask of you, please stop and think before you point a finger. I hear and read so much hatred towards our law enforcement! It's quite scary. So many of them risk their lives daily to keep us safe... and we are so focused on the bad as a nation that we are grouping all of them into one category... one big group of rotten eggs! Stop! Show some respect and I guarantee they will respect you in return. I also see many of you saying Black Lives Matter... but how many of you have friends of other colors and cultural backgrounds in your circles? I hope those of you storming the streets are doing more than just waving a sign and chanting. What am I doing you ask? I am raising my children to love like Jesus. I'm raising my children to see diversity and appreciate each and every person God puts in their lives! I may not be in the streets with a sign... I may not participate in every social media event... but trust me when I say, I care and I'm teaching my children to love, listen, and care.

Lastly, I want to leave this on my page...

If you have ever felt hurt by me or not cared for.. I sincerely apologize. I can honestly say, my intent is never to hurt anyone. I know it's easy to throw out there that "I'm not perfect" and use it as a blanket excuse for my actions. So if you needed to hear this, know that I'm not giving you an excuse. I truly apologize.

We are all in need of a Savior because whether we want to admit it or not, we have all hurt someone in some way, intentionally or not. I am so thankful that despite my failures the Lord is full of grace, mercy, love, and compassion towards me. I am so humbled by this truth. I want to mirror those qualities the best that I can. I want to see George Floyd through the eyes of God... a man worth sending His one and Only Son to die on the cross to save him. I want to see that police officer that is held responsible for taking this man's life as a man who is also loved by God so much that Jesus Christ died for him. How can I do this you ask? Why would God love a man who supposedly took the life of another? I can't explain that to you. I can say that as a victim of harassment and racism, I have learned the importance of grace and forgiveness. I cannot live my life harboring hate towards another individual. Some may say, "You are white. You are privileged." My response to those who think that is: please take the time to hear my story before you form your opinions of me. The truth is that we live in a fallen world. Not everyone will see each other through the eyes of our Savior. So I ask of you reader, set the example! Be a Christ follower. Love like Jesus, and pray that your heart will learn to love all people no matter the circumstance. Remember, you don't have to see eye to eye to love like Jesus. Let's end this storm peacefully and pray that all the rain made our gardens grow bigger and more beautiful than before!

Dear Heavenly Father,
I come to You humbly asking for peace and guidance through this storm in our lives. Help us to love like You. Help us to show compassion. Help us to listen. Help us to stop pointing fingers and lashing out. Help our first priority to be bringing others to the foot of your thrown in surrender... that we may all rejoice with You in heaven for all of eternity. Thank You for Your grace, mercy, love, compassion, and forgiveness You grant to us daily. May we be cross bearers, mirroring You, to the best of our ability ever day of our lives here on earth.
In Christ's beloved name,
Amen

Scripture:

"My command is this: love each other as I have loved you." John15:12

"He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is His steadfast love toward those who fear Him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does He remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to His children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear Him." Psalm 103:10-13

"For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16