Once upon a time, I feared I was going to lose everyone closest to me. I thought God might just snatch me up and I'd leave all my family behind. It took forever to figure out why I was so fearful of death. Turns out, it wasn't death... it was leaving those I hold closest in my heart behind. (Morbid... who thinks of this crap.... right)?? So, I grew really attached to my mom.
There were many other reasons why I clung to her... Every play date to McDonalds in Pre-K, every slumber party in elementary school, every tear I shed during those wretched middle school years, every Wednesday for coffee dates after school, and those random days we'd drive up to my high school and decide to go shopping and out for lunch instead, she was there. Everyone tends to look at a mother-daughter relationship and think terribly of them if they admit to being best friends. Well, a best friend is someone who stands up for you, believes and supports you, loves you deeply for the person God has created you to be, and sticks it out in both the good and bad times. Yes, she is my mom first and foremost, but she is also my very best friend. I wouldn't be who I am today if it weren't for her. I wouldn't have the relationship I have with my heavenly Father if it weren't for her teaching me and pointing me back to Him in every aspect of my life. I praise God for her and thank God for my family every day. I am no longer afraid of the day when Christ calls me home; He's the reason for the life we live. All praise and thanks belongs to Him alone.
I used to wonder what God's hugs felt like every time I'd lie awake in bed at night. Sometimes I'd get up and go crawl in bed with my parents when I went through months of anxiety attacks. My mom would hug me so tight it felt like she'd never let go... and then one night it hit me and I whispered in my mom's ear, "God is hugging me through you."
No matter how difficult it is to grow up, God is always HERE.... and my night light is always on.
"Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the LORD rises upon you." -Isaiah 60:1
"Give thanks to the LORD, call on His name; make known among the nations what He has done." -1 Chronicles 16:8